My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
