I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
