a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
