"it" just moved
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
