haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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