$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Every concussion has its silver lining
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize
