she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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