she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
