Say something about gay babies.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
