i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
