I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
