Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
