Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
