"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
