What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
