i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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