arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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