I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
