those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
