Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize