I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
