I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
