Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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