He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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