Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
stop calling my apartment porn island.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
