Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
