I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
