I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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