so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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