never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
