honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
