OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Its about making memories worth repressing
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
