i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
