Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize
