As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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