You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
