worst night to have a conscience
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
