Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize