you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
3pm strippers are depressing
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
