Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
