where am i from again
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
