Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
