There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
