in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
