My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize