I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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