All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
