Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
