You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Say something about gay babies.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
