I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
